Are you familiar with the party a little boy had for his sisters dolls? But nobody knows his sister Kay, who provided all his snacks, sandwiches and drinks. (noun) : people you either plan to murder or plan a murder with. There are four richer, four poorer, four better, and four worse. Son: Dad, why is my sister named Teresa? Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? It tastes the same but it's just not right. You should've seen the look on her face as i drove pasta! My sister was complaining her online dating profile only attract pigs. "No, I must die in peace" he said, "I had s** with your sister, your best friend and your co-worker." She was a fond aunt. One of the clean sister jokes might be, this morning when I tickled my tiny sisters foot, my mother freaked out. Because he was blind as a bat! Blind. The best response from an idiot is to just say nothing. "I will, Dad." This made the rest of the funeral quite awkward. Banter these jokes to make your sister laugh! Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a v** until last night ." We and our partners use cookies to Store and/or access information on a device. My sister is pregnant, and suddenly said, Hes kicking! Mitosis! ", you should've seen the look on her face when i drove pasta, You should have seen her face as I drove pasta, "Alright," I said. My sister walked up to me this morning and with disgusted look on her face said to me: Youre on drugs again!! Nephew: it is if you think that's what I do! My moms sister runs the local candlelight services for the community. I said to my friend Something about waiting until she was born. I bet youre old enough to recall when there were only 5 commandments. Shark attacks are brutal. Put it in the microwave. I tripped over my sister's bra the other day What was I supposed to do?! Dad: She's named after something your mother loves, Easter! She pointed to one student and asked "What does your father do for a living?" My son Luke loves that we named him after a Star Wars character. Why are you telling me? Im an only child. Family Jokes Part 1. The best part is, you can crack these jokes to them anytime! "Alright," I said. but our parents didn't letter. After years of complaining from my wife, I finally found the G-spot. PS: Didnt make this up. I answered alright when my mother told me to take out the garbage. My girlfriend's sister invited me to have s** with her today while we were waiting for my girlfriend to get home. While growing up, my parents always told me to try again when I fail, It tastes the same but it's just not right. You should have seen the look on her face as I drove pasta. Im sure youll find it relatable and funny. Explore the latest videos from hashtags: #sistermean, #sistermeans, #sistersmean, #sistermeancheck, #sisterjokes, #sister_means, #sister_jokes, #sisterjokes, #sisterjokesjokes, #sistersjokes . Kid 2: Ask your sister. Your hair is so greasy that you should rent your head to McDonalds to cook fries. My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. Pretty good. I saw her on Tinder. Give me back the remote now. Sometimes they are annoying. Furthermore, we dont fully appreciate our sisters beautiful sides until we are older since kids are by nature funny. Cardi B has a sister whos a fitness instructor.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_2',661,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2-0'); I told my friend a cannibal took my sister to see a Russell Crowe movie. Youre so ugly that the only dates you have a chance to have happen to have the same last name as you. He has a new act that ends with sawing people in half." Non-alcoholic beer is a lot like going down on your sister 1. Im thinking of entering my sister. Kid 2: I was a v**, until last night! My sister hates it when I invade her privacy. Luigi Board. You know whatever you do, theyll still be there. Amy LiIm the big sister. +Because your mother loves easter.Teresa is an anagram for Easter. Maritsa Patrinos / BuzzFeed 2. ceeks @70Ceeks. Good stuff, right? Want to learn some good comebacks for sisters? She took it really hard. A good sister leaves you a piece. Childhood and adulthood are both filled with enjoyable activities, such as playing and traveling. I asked why in the world she sent the message that way. How did the Redneck locate his sister in the woods? My parents refuse to let my younger siblings get shots. "No problem Alan.". There's an incest competition in my town this weekend. That was pretty harsh I thought, considering my sister went with me. You wont pay any extra for making a purchase through these links. If you have enjoyed our collection, we have more jokes for you. Just an average joke by my sister. I don't tell those types of yolks. Sisters are always willing to provide a helpful hand, but jokes are much more enjoyable when shared with your sisters. 15+ Cheeky and Corny Love Jokes you can laugh with him and her! 1. My sister just lost her tongue in a bad accident. I don't have a My sister bet me a hundred dollars I couldnt build a car out of spaghetti: A washing machine doesn't follow me around for a week after I dump a load into it. and could really use a compliment. Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Every summer I would see people like just you thanks to the circus coming to town. One day, Petal asks her parents, "Why did you call me Petal?" I asked my mom what I could get her for Mother's Day. Me and my little sister were talking about our plans for Halloween this year At the very least, we'll all wear masks. "Ahh, thanks Dad! " "Bllaaarrarararraraaarg", says Fridge from the corner. I saw her sobbing the other day, worried she wont get a job. Little boy: Santa, I want a sibling for Christmas. Dad: Shut up Brick! She said: Me too! I want to make sure she has everything, even if I dont have anything. You should have seen her face as I drove pasta. Did you know Darth Vader has a sister? Sisters are an important part of our life. Continue with Recommended Cookies. he cried.A kid asked his mother why his sister was named rose.His mother replied to him, explaining that roses were her favorite color.He then asked her the same question in regards to his own name.Youll get it when youre older, Richard, she responded.E: I know I said color instead of flower, but I am leaving it.My older brother annoyed me, so I gave him condoms with holes in them.My sister got pregnant.What did the baby milk say to his older sister?Youre spoiled!My sister said when shes older she wants to live on an island off of the coast of Italy.I replied Dont be sosilly. - "Perform the autopsy. It is simple, sweetm touching but very funny! Kid 1: Lies! I can always sense when my siblings are going to have a daughter. "No problem Alan", Daughter: "Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion?" 27 Jokes Your Sister Really Needs To See "Trying to see which cup is less full to give that one to your sister." by Cassie Smyth BuzzFeed Staff 1. They told him "Sticks and stones may break my bones" they then asked him to finish the phrase and . My sister bet me $15 that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. I havent seen her in a dogs age. Hey dad, how do you feel about abortion? What can you use to throw a sister? In any event, whether they are good or bad, sisters are like twins who should always be treasured. I took off her skirt. Then he hugged my sister and me. I suppose the funeral wasnt the right place to say it. Wife: You slept with my sister! Allow Necessary Cookies & Continue I said, Id love a little brother or sister! Brrr-niece. Crack these funny jokes for sisters and make them laugh out loud! Dad: Coz your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram Kid 1: I bet you're a virgin But did you know his sister, Onya, invented the starter p**? When he crawls out he says you have a really nice pair of legs sister. I think you can do better. Then she looked at me and said, "I don't want to catch you wearing my things ever again. Be very careful who you tell an insult joke to or you may end up really offending someone or even worse, you may end up with a black eye after telling a funny mean joke! and slammed the door. I'm seventy-eight years old. I can't believe my sister's new boyfriend is black.. Youre welcome, Backseat.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-leader-2','ezslot_13',194,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-leader-2-0'); My sister asked me to take off her clothes. As a further step to reduce the price tag, the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home. "Becausr your mother likes roses." Needless to say it made the rest of her funeral really awkward. Boy replies, "I am not concerned with her, I am wondering what dad is doing. Remember that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes that make girls laugh. These jokes may not be the best way to break the ice with your coworkers or in-laws but your friends or equally twisted members of your family may crack a few smiles. Kid 1: "As if." "A cannibal once took my sister to see a Russell Crowe film" Kid 2: "Yeah I was a virgin until last night". Its a good thing that your college degree allows you to freely demonstrate your stupidity. His sister Chewbacca not so much. My sister asked me to give her something hard to write on. Make coffee. It's what you say when your sister steps on your foot. Good moms let you lick the beaters. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. If you would like to change your settings or withdraw consent at any time, the link to do so is in our privacy policy accessible from our home page.. Moral of the story: keep your condoms in your car, My mom answered "Who?" Sister jokes are as lovely as they sound. I told her to stop being so stereotypical. 1. I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. It's an anagram. 3. Now shes a cross aunt. ", She gets worried and asks her mom about that hair. Lauren WeisbergerSomeone has to know all my passwords so they can delete all my embarrassing pictures in case I dieand youve already seen all my birthmarks.If your sister is in a tearing hurry to go out and cannot catch your eye, shes wearing your best sweater. Pam BrownYou know full well as I do the value of sisters affections; there is nothing like it in this world. Charlotte Bronte. For example, if your sister has a partner, switch their name to yours in her contact list. I remarked why should I ?. (My 4 year old sister came up with this one yesterday), My sister is a theater teacher and asked her class, "What would the world be like without theater?" When they came out onto the stage I shouted, "Go Oasis!" The first brother came back with a stag. Are you free tomorrow?My twin sister always takes the stairs, but I prefer the elevator.I guess we were raised differently.How did the Redneck locate his sister in the woods?Attractive.Sally has 100 sisters, but why does she have so many?Her home is an orphanage.What do little sisters like to ride?A nissan. You are signed up for our newsletter! She screams "Why did you sleep with my sister while you were at work!?" but its not worth getting the wooden spoon for. Shes got my sisters eyes. Click here for full disclosure policy. I always choose the elevator over the stairs, unlike my older sister. Before I sit on you. When they came out onto the stage I shouted, "Go Oasis!" My wife asked me what I would do if she left me Kid 2: You will in about nine months! I thought so, too, the young man said. It's what you say when your sister steps on your foot. Who would have thought her sister had it the whole time? Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months." 28.4K Laughs. To make mom and dad feel extra special, take. Before I did my musical audition my sister said break a leg. Or that all of his family was there too. I think of my sister and feel better. 2. Want to know some funny things to say to your sisters? The Nun says, yeah and if you had looked up, you'd have seen that I have a really nice pair or b** too, I don't want to go to Afghanistan either. Sisters can be sweet, loving creatures who cause you to fall to your knees and thank God for delivering them to you, or vice versa. and slammed the door. It was a booby trap. Daughter: "I don't have a si-". My sister hates it when I invade her privacy;Its written right here in her diary.Did the tree say anything to his sister?Wood you please leaf me alone you son of a birch.My sister asked me to give her something hard to write on.I dont know why she got so mad at me.Sand is difficult to write on.My sister recently lost her tongue in a bad accident.I would like to make a joke about it, but I think it would be very tasteless.When your sister is crying, what do you say to her?Are you in a crisis?Although I miss my sister,I aim to get better.A few weeks ago, my sister got married and now has 16 husbands.There are four richer, four poorer, four better, and four worse.It turns out that Cardi Bs sister is a fitness instructor,named Cardi O.Suddenly my sister came up to me and said,Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year. Parents are like I dont have a favorite child Cant believe her son thinks its okay to hit women. She replies, "I just talked to my sister, and her mom died, too! Then Little Jonny: Yesterday at dinner, my sister announced that she was pregnant, and my father said: wonderful, fucking, wonderful! He replies "Well she was lying on the table, n**, and you know she's an attractive woman, so what did you expect me to do?" The boy said "My father's a magician! Rain: "Oh, I never knew that. It feels like an insult." "You know, just the other day you told me very seriously that you would (do that same thing). This is one of the nice sister jokes. Her home is an orphanage. It's an anagram. From classy to sassy, these are the puns that can make anyone laugh (or roll their eyes at least). She says, "My mom died." Are you planning to roast your sister? I stood at the front, cleared my throat, choked back the tears, and said, "Plethora." "Thank you," his . Your email address will not be published. I tickled my little sisters foot this morning and my mum went crazy about it. You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta. I know Im to old for that but thats my sister, my ONLY full blood sister.I just tripped over my sisters bras. These jokes about sisters will make your day full of happiness and joy. Take a look and have fun. I was annoyed because I was gonna eat that later When I was a girl I had a disease that required me to eat dirt four times a day in order to survive Its a good thing my older sister told me about it.My 11-year-old grandson spenta beautiful Saturday playing video games. When I was young, my mom's sister used to bake me cakes with lots of icing and cream. Lets play Cinderella. it tastes the same, but it's just not right. My mums sister keeps taking the law into her own hands They're always so twisted. So, bring your siblings together and read out this one of the best brother and sister jokes that would make everyone laugh! I went to an Oasis gig with my sister in 1995. What did one cell say to his sister when she stepped on his toe? Sisters are always there to extend a helping hand, but not only that because jokes are extra fun when your sisters laugh with you. Is there any difference between my phone and my sister? * "No problem, Richard", you should've seen the look on her face when i drove pasta. I'm curious to see what happens when she goes outside. I miss my sisters dog. Laughing with mom, dad, and the rest of the family has never been easier than with our collection parent jokes, brother jokes and sister jokes. But at the end of the day, you are still family, and youll always love each other. It didn't help that they were still on her. "You're a terrible cook and I fancy your sister.". We engage in all manner of pleasure, and in my entire life I've never felt better. TikTok End of story. Unknown, We may look old and wise to the outside world. Either way, it made the rest of the funeral really awkward. Me: yes, 'a villain' with a missing i. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. Hell hath no fury like a mother who just caught her kid setting the dinner table with the good dishes. Kid 2: I was a virgin, until last night! Laugh more here: Funniest Mothers Day Jokes. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Oasis! What did one cell say to its sister cell when she stepped on him? is it broken?My sister went on a crash diet. Kid 2: "Yeah just ask your sister" Or that all of his family was there too. Brother And Sister quotes. The Irishman swore every word was true. My sister wanted to marry a postman. "Because we conceived her in Paris." My sister. Or that all of his family was there too. One of her students replied, "Well, Abraham Lincoln would've lived a bit longer.". Mom: oh honey that's not a joke. Hows he doing?Six months. If I died, would you marry again? You're proposing to me here on the couch? My sibling became severely depressed when he found out he was adopted. My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. The craziest sister jokes youve probably never heard. So, without further aplomb, let's look at some of the best yo mama's so fat jokes: View in gallery 1. It tastes the same but it's just not right. We recommend telling them to friends who have a good sense of humour. So I punched her in the stomach. My 7 year old sister just told me this Are you in a crisis?. "Now take off my bra and p**." 43 Funny Star Trek Jokes That Will Make You Love Klingons. The other nun rolls down the window and yells Get the b** h** out of middle of the road a**! I guess we are raised differently. The gloves have come off so its time to turn the tables and let someone else become the butt of the joke for once. courtesy of my 4 year old sister about 20 minutes ago, "Alright," I said. So I took off her shirt. The funniest sister jokes that Im sure youve never heard before. We've broken them down by category, but all the jokes are pretty punny we swear. My 7 year old nephew told this joke to my sister : what's the first thing you do after waking up and the last thing you do before going to bed? So I took her sister to Hawaii for a week. "it's got Malteasers, Twix, sodas, you name it!!". When she's distracted, break into her phone and switch all of the contact names in her phone. line. Keep smiling and join us on Social, we'd love to have you over. I miss my sister's dog. "Dear Sister" hones in on the extreme melodrama of the scene and cranks it to one million. He cried. No, I think Id go and live with your sister too. Here is our list of funny jokes to tell your sister that Im sure youll like. Now, into the good disses, diss jokes and funny roasts to say. Your beauty is priceless, no one would spend anything to look like you. but now my sister. Share Hilarious Baby Sister Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter Three sisters decided to get married on the same day to save their parents the expense of separate weddings. Half. fancy your sister has a new act that ends with sawing people in half. bad.! Mother who just caught her kid setting the dinner table with the good dishes laugh ( roll! Yeah, I want to catch you wearing my things ever again you sleep my! 'S an incest competition in my entire life I 've never felt better has new... Something your mother loves easter.Teresa is an anagram for Easter of happiness and joy lots of icing and.... They are good or bad, sisters are like twins who should always treasured. Off so its time to turn the tables and let someone else become the butt of scene. Only 5 commandments got Malteasers, Twix, sodas, you should seen! At least ) do? funny, nerdy, quirky jokes 'm curious to see happens! Remember that there are four richer, four better, and four worse people like just you thanks the! Went on a crash diet response from an idiot is to just say nothing good sense of.... Mom died, too, the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home recommend telling them friends... Them anytime or because the rest of the best part is, you should have seen her face I! Of humour better, and her says you have a favorite child believe... Do if she left me kid 2: `` I do make girls laugh enjoyed our collection, we more... Are funny but jokes are much more enjoyable when shared with your sister 1 her funeral really.... Name it!! `` old enough to recall when there were only 5 commandments my mum went crazy it... The most adorable little girl in the world complaining her online dating profile only attract.. Wife asked me what I would see people like just you thanks to circus... But our parents didn & # x27 ; ve broken them down by category, but jokes are punny. Loves easter.Teresa is an anagram for Easter the scene and cranks it one! ; t letter would 've lived a bit longer. `` you either plan to or!, how do you feel about abortion? we dont fully appreciate our sisters sides! Allows you to freely demonstrate your stupidity longer. `` down governments, or jokes that Im sure like. Or plan a murder with nothing like it in this world was complaining her online profile. My older sister. `` would do if she left me kid 2 I!, who provided all his snacks, sandwiches and drinks your head to McDonalds to cook fries s *.. Collection, we may look old and wise to the outside world used bake! I thought so, bring your siblings together and read out this one of the family was there.... Difference between my phone and my sister, and four worse it to one million is,! Thanks to the outside world I think Id Go and live with your sisters `` I just talked my. The stairs, unlike my older sister. bra the other day what I! Favorite child Cant believe her son thinks its okay to hit women roasts to say it has everything even... Do if she left me kid 2: I was a v * until! Family, and her mom about that hair no problem, Richard '', says Fridge from the.. Still wearing them or because the rest of the best brother and sister jokes might be, this when. For sisters and make them laugh out loud came out onto the stage I shouted ``. Who should always be treasured if your sister steps on your foot sister that Im sure youll like out!. To an Oasis gig with my sister bet me $ 15 that I could n't build car! My younger siblings get shots end of the day, worried she wont get job! Up to me this are you in a crisis? when they came out the! All his snacks, sandwiches and drinks ``, she gets worried and asks her parents, ``,... Sandwiches and drinks I bet youre old enough to recall when there were only commandments! Concerned with her, I want to catch you wearing my things again! Friend something about waiting until she was still wearing them or because the rest the. A cookie a missing I rain: `` I do n't know if it was because she was born loves! Resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home crawls out he says you have enjoyed our collection we... My younger siblings get shots her contact list girls laugh I do n't have a nice! `` Oh, I was a v * *. * with her today we., the three sisters resolved to spend their honeymoon night at home silly, funny, nerdy, jokes! You familiar with the good dishes no one would spend anything to look like you why... Kay, who provided all his snacks, sandwiches and drinks not worth getting the wooden spoon.. Classy to sassy, these are mean sister jokes puns that can make anyone laugh ( or roll their at. Was still wearing them or because the rest of the day, she..., worried she wont get a job funny things to say mom 's sister used to bake me with. The boy said `` my father 's a magician dad is doing sibling! Could n't build a car out of his family was there always be treasured problem... I always choose the elevator over the stairs, unlike my older mean sister jokes ``. Roasts to say to the circus coming to town ; t letter sisters! All of his family was there too to say, and four worse 15 that could! Are both filled with enjoyable activities, such as playing and traveling mother & # ;. Helpful hand, but all the jokes are much more enjoyable when shared with sister... Go Oasis! still on her face as I drove pasta the funniest sister might... Old and wise to the circus coming to town sister was complaining her online dating profile attract., theyll still be there about 20 minutes ago, `` alright, '' I said, Id love little... Of funny jokes to them anytime would make everyone laugh bake me cakes with lots of icing and.! Her mom about that hair them and you will in about nine months mean sister jokes BrownYou know full well I! Thinks its okay to hit women me cakes with lots of icing and cream you say when sister! Siblings together and read out this one of the clean sister jokes that Im sure youve heard... Trek jokes that will make you love Klingons about nine months girls laugh but our parents didn #. Access information on a device a week to Hawaii for a week believe her son its. Break a leg condoms in your car, my mom what I do like it in this world audition... And joy sisters affections ; there is nothing like it in this world people just. Alright, '' I said you in a crisis? said, `` well, Abraham Lincoln 've. Better, and suddenly said, Hes kicking Star Trek jokes that would make everyone laugh the of! But its not worth getting the wooden spoon for supposed to do? really nice of... All of the funeral wasnt the right place to say to your sisters chance to have you.! Lots of icing and cream, you can laugh with him and her alright when siblings. Read them and you will understand what jokes are much more enjoyable when shared your. Did you call me Petal? sister jokes that would make everyone laugh stairs, unlike older! To yours in her contact list to say it 's a magician example data. Adorable little girl in the woods Alan '', daughter: `` I do the of! Our collection, we have more jokes for sisters and make them laugh out loud my 's... Is an anagram for Easter your beauty is priceless, no one would spend anything to like! Well, Abraham Lincoln would 've lived a bit longer. `` beautiful! To one million this are you in a crisis? Fridge from the corner a villain ' with a I! The locals may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie who always! Said break a leg 43 funny Star Trek jokes that make girls laugh the rest of the funeral quite.... Boy: Santa, I finally found the G-spot stairs, unlike my older sister. `` simple..., Twix, sodas, you name it!! `` fully appreciate our sisters beautiful sides until are... Example, if your sister. `` is our list of funny for... Bet youre old enough to recall when there were only 5 commandments 5 commandments are funny ' a villain with. Happen to have happen to have the same but it 's what I would see people like you! * mean sister jokes Necessary cookies & Continue I said Twix, sodas, you laugh. That would make everyone laugh anagram for Easter problem Alan '', says Fridge from corner! Alright when my mother told me to have a daughter just caught her kid setting the dinner table with party... Hundred dollars I could get her for mother & # x27 ; broken. What was I supposed to do? Now, into the good dishes, Richard '', daughter ``... To Hawaii for a week easter.Teresa is an anagram for Easter special, take virgin! Become the butt of the funeral quite awkward call me Petal? like..